Sometimes it is the honesty of a toddler that puts everything into perspective. Sometimes it is the innocence and genuine thoughtfulness illustrated by something they say or do that reminds me of the purity and goodness that all humans are born with. And sometimes it is a simple, unassuming observation made by a child that leaves a smile on my face for days.
If we could all be more honest and frank with one another, life would be a lot more straight forward and simple. Toddlers, and when I say toddlers I am speaking mostly of Addy and Asher because I know them the best of all toddlers, say what they mean, when they mean it. Toddlers don't sugar coat anything they say for the sake of sparing the feelings of others, and they certainly don't take into consideration common etiquette. While I have been spared the embarrassment (so far) of our children pointing to a disfigured person, or someone with an obvious malformity and stating the obvious, I HAVE been within earshot of such a circumstance in the past and it is NOT a comfortable situation to be in, especially for the parent of the "honest" child.
The closest we have gotten to an uncomfortable public statement occurred this week at Whole Foods. Standing in the line at check out, there was a very impatient woman in front of us. She was huffing, fidgeting, and rolling her eyes at the cashier in training. This cashier was certainly taking extended time to ring up the groceries of the first woman in line, but it was apparent that she was trying her best to be as speedy as she could. While we were in a bit of a hurry ourselves, it would have done nothing to remedy the situation to be rude or insensitive. Even a toddler could have told you that. Regardless, the impatient woman ahead of us, whose expressions of intolerance had grown irritating, turned to us and said, "they WOULD have to pick the busy lunch hour to train their imbecile employees. Don't they know some of us have real jobs to get back to. I'm in a hurry." As if to put an exclamation on the statement, she stomped her foot and left the line all together. I was rather taken aback by her statement, and left almost speechless. Luckily, Asher knew just what to say, and stated it with such matter-of-fact honesty, we all had to give him accolades. As the, dare I say, bitchy lady stormed away, Asher asked, "Mama, that lady very angry? She need go to time out?" He noticed her obvious anger, and knowing that when he gets very angry and needs to take a break to think about getting things back under control, he takes a "time out," he assumed that the angry lady could use one too. By saying so, he broke the silence nicely, and even my apology to the cashier for the woman's behavior didn't compare to Asher's matter of fact, honest observation. He put it into perspective for all of us.
Asher is my sensitive little man. He has his feelings hurt more frequently than his sister, and is much easier to discipline. However, Addy is also quite nurturing, and will offer hugs and kisses to anyone she feels needs them. Both kids very much have others' backs. That is, when one gets hurt, the other is there to comfort them. When one is crying, the other is right beside them with a toy or bunny for comfort. And, if one receives a gift that they think is extra cool, they can usually be counted on to share it with their sibling or at least let the other twin check it out briefly. At bedtime every night, Addy asks for a sip of water. We bring it to her bed for a quick sip before turning out the lights. And, every night before we leave, she says "Thank you. Give Asher some water." She is adamant that Asher gets a sip of water too. Similarly, upon tucking Asher into bed, I make sure he has his "key" animals in his bed- Doggie, Bunny, Bear, Mickey, Grover, and Cookie Monster. After I make sure that he has them all, he always asks me to check if Addy has hers- Bunny, Valentina, and Blossom. Despite the fact that both occurrences happen every night, it warms my heart and pleases me to think that our children have an innate goodness within them and genuine concern for humanity.
Consistent with the award winning show "Kids Say the Darndest Things," mine do too. I am certain that I could fill a thirty minute time slot with hilarious musings that my babies have said in their lives so far, and I am sure that I'll hear countless more statements that will find me in stitches in the coming years. I really should start to write them down. This past week, a friend of mine mentioned something that her daughter said to her, and every time I recall it, I can't help but smile. This comes from the mouth of a three year old, upon seeing a photograph taken of her with her mother, father, and brother. "Braden looks dirty, Daddy looks angry, I look perfect, and Mama, you look scary." For some reason, this honest observation makes me smile, and reiterates the fact that toddlers are hilarious, and often the best company one can have.
Toddlers are a lot of work. The require constant attention, constant discipline and nurturing, and constant role modeling. Most of all, they require constant, unconditional love. And when toddlers are given the things they need to thrive, we see their most exceptional characteristics shine through. Addy and Asher are the most incredible little people that I know (although I AM biased since I grew them). Their purity and honesty makes for dramatic but heart-warming situations daily, and reminds me what the most important things are in life. They are little people with the world at their fingertips, who cannot be more loved by their Mama and Dada- not for the thoughtful things they do, or the hilarious things they say, necessarily, but because they are Addy and Asher. They are simply amazing, and we are so lucky.
Welcome to Twinfinite Love. I hope that my periodic entries shed some light on the sometimes chaotic, but always joyful day-to-day shenanigans that come with raising twins. I can assure you, our life is never boring, and I have the blog to prove it.